Detox of Life!

As many of you may know, the season of lent is approaching, and in light of actually thinking about what would bring me closer to my purpose, and farther from my temptations/distractions, I would like to discuss "Detoxing Our Lives".

On average, we could say that most young people spend 15-18 hours awake each day.  Now, of those 15-18 hours, how many are spent literally wasting time??  With today's iPad's, iPhones, iPods, portable gaming devices, Facebook, YouTube, Netflix, Twitter, etc., even time that is meant to be reserved for school, is wasted.  All of these distractions are temptations of our time, and our character.  Do we tell mom we're studying late, so we can stay up and catch up on the Pretty Little Liars series?  Do we cheat ourselves, and God, by not fully applying every ounce of our attention to our school work, during class time?  Are our minds constantly wandering to the cyber world, because we feel it's so much safer, than the real world?  Who/what are we truly worshiping?  One heavenly God, or thousands of mind warping, materialistic gods?

What recently brought this problem to my attention, was actually.... me.  That's right!  My life has really been screwed up by 'distractions'.  For me it's: friends (who aren't the best influence in my walk with God), Facebook, Netflix, movies/dvds, junk food, and bad music.  When my life really starting going south, and I began to feel spiritually, emotionally, and physically weak, I began to wonder, "What am I really doing with the life/time God has given me?"  For many years, I thought I was living an 'okay' life. I had friends, fun, and lots of down time.  It wasn't until I was able to start truly feeling the effect of these  on my life, that I freaked out!  I was killing myself, and throwing away everything God had given me, all because I was following the lead of the media, and my friends, being apathetic towards life, and just flat out lazy!  Relationships with my family deteriorated, and I started to see the world from a sad, self-worshiping, point of view.  It was literally DEPRESSING!

As the lent season of 2012 began to roll around, I started thinking to myself, "If this season is meant for recognizing the sacrifice Jesus made for us, by sacrificing His life, shouldn't I give up these things that have become my life, and my distraction/disgrace toward Him?"  I began to think of all the things I might ACTUALLY GET DONE, with these negative distractions gone... Test taking back to a regular schedule, my driver's license, weight loss, family time, quiet time with/for God, faith strengthening, and maybe even become fluent in Spanish!  Ha, ha!  All those things, versus what I had allowed myself to become!?

After considering all I could get done, I thought of all I would be giving up... that was my comfort zone, my life, my routine... how scary would it be to walk into the darkness of change, and not know what was beyond each step?  All the cravings to return to familiar shores, all the temptations, all the torment.... was it worth it?  When I take a step back, and see who/what I've allowed myself to become, I say, "yes!  It is worth every moment!  It certainly won't be easy, and there may be days where I fail epically, but I know that God will see my repentance, my hope, and my effort to be a better person for Him, and He will lift me up, and give me the strength to finish the 'race marked out'."

If you're out there tonight, looking at your life, and wondering where it first started to slip, know that it's never too late.  Until your final breath, you have the opportunity to change who you choose to be, and to strive to live differently.  It won't be easy, and the devil will pursue you, but you will cry out, "Get behind me, Satan, for my hope rests in the Lord, God, Almighty, and you shall have no power over me, for God is on my side, and He alone remains forever in control!"  So dig deep in your hearts, find what's hurting you today, and 'cut it out' of your life for good.  I know that we can do this, but our strength must be in the Lord, our wonderful Father in Heaven, who will catch us when we fall, and cheer as we start to reach the finish line!!

God bless you, and your searching!

~ Clay

New Blog Playlist!!

In preparation of Valentines' Day, I've gotten an early jump on the upcoming holiday (along with most of the local franchises)!  LOL!! I hope you enjoy the new music available on my page!!

My Hope for Your New Year :)

At some point you have to realize the people in your life who do matter; who would be there for you in a split second, and who live by a two-way friendship lane, and not one... & the people who will probably disappear from your life, the second they don't need your friendly, one-way friendship lane services anymore. This 2012, treasure those two-way friends/family like priceless jewels. Have a blessed year! :)

The Greatest Comfort

Sometimes, the greatest comfort in life, when you're down, and crying, is not a perky friend who says, "It'll be okay, eventually," to try to comfort you... but it's the friend who comes to you, with tears in his/her eyes, and says, "Let me cry with you.  We'll get through this together," that truly soothes a person's breaking soul.  It's not always about strong, protective arms to run to, but it's about an understanding soul to grow with in strength, faith, hope, and love.


I find comfort in the arms of one who I can cry with... I hope you find that someone too. :)


Happy New Year!! :D

A Breaking Heart...

If you think your heart is breaking, run to the great Craftsman for protection and healing...


If you think your heart is breaking, don't think you have to be strong, because tears aren't a sign of weakness, they're a sign of healing....


If you think your heart is breaking, don't think that your best friend will be able to comfort you past, "Things will get better," because, as much as they may care, they haven't been in your shoes...


If you think your heart is breaking, don't try to ignore it, because that will just kill you.  Embrace the heartache...


If you think your heart is breaking, go do something for someone who is hurting greater than yourself...


If your heart is broken, buckle up for a bumpy ride, but never ask to get off the ride! :) <3

And in these Trials... We are Not Alone

I had the opportunity to speak at my local community's Christian youth group gathering, Boerne Live, and once again, I am in awe of Him.  As of this morning, I was not planning on attending the concert benefit, and then, around 12pm, I received an email from my youth director, wondering if I would consider sharing my testimony at the benefit.  It was like God calling me out to this place tonight, and finding a way to get me there.  You see, no matter what we think we decide, if we stray from the path, God will find a way to call us back.  Being able to get up there, and look across rows, and rows of high school teens like me, was beyond special... it was AWESOME!  They were alive with HIM tonight!  Alive with His LOVE, and alive with His innocent BEAUTY!  It makes you feel like you are not in this alone, and that you do belong somewhere... with the people of God. :)


If you are out there tonight, wondering if you are the last man standing... I challenge you to go out and LIVE LIFE with risks of failure, risks of frustration, risks of rejection, and risks of success!  If you live your life, hidden away, how can God's awesomeness ever shine?  You are His light, His torch, His clay!  Let the Potter mold you, by loosening up, and giving yourself to Him.  There will you find peace in this Storm. :)  May God bless you, hold you, hug you, love you, and guide you... wherever you are tonight. :)


Peace-Love-Christ


Clay

"Mr. Right"

Q- If you waste your whole life waiting for the guy you think is “Mr. Right” to ask you out, yet all the while totally deny yourself the chance to possibly find happiness with a guy who is not what you ever imagined you would grow to like as more than a friend, is that subjecting yourself to a life alone?  One, who seems to be “Mr. Right” only looks the part.  The other, “Mr. Idk”, loves you for you, has told you so, and continues to try to be ‘something’ for you. He doesn’t seem to fit the image you imagined of the guy you are meant to be with someday, but what if that imaginary guy is also unrealistic?  One who loved you at your worst, or the other, who left before you got to the worst?  Is going for "Mr. Idk" settling?  Or finally realizing what is important in life/love? 

I keep telling myself, “This dude better be amazing if you give your heart/life to him... He better appreciate all you are, and be totally deserving of that.”... But what if he does appreciate me, and I’ve just been to “Goody Two Shoes” to appreciate him, for all that he is?  What if the perfect guy is actually disguised as someone the world tells us to not get involved with, for a reason.  Just like me.  The person that finally recognizes me as something special, should be something special, because God gave him eyes to see the beauty in who I am.  The world tells me that, by dating ‘that guy’, I’m cutting myself short, or settling... but the world’s way isn’t always the right way.  What if the guy I’m meant to be isn’t Prince Charming, but instead, Prince Integrity?  I just SO want to do things right, and I’m scared to do anything, because it could lead to failure.  As a young Christian woman, I believe I owe it to myself, and to God, to focus less on the later, and more on the now.  Why worry about something that is not meant for me in this moment?  When I could be concentrating on what is!  

As far as love, and "Mr. Right" goes, I can only pray that God give me the the insight to see him for all that he is, and the grace to appreciate him, the way I want him to appreciate me. :)

Peace-Love-Christ,

Clay

♥ When I meet a man who truly loves Christ more than me, I'll know he's the one. :) ♥

Control Freak?

LOL! So, I'm back!  If you are like me, you probably prefer a situation to be predictable, promising, and controlled by... wait for it... you!  Ha, ha!  If so, no worries!  Lately, the challenge of wanting to control EVERYTHING has lingered long and weighed heavily on the doorstep of my heart.  So much of me knows that I am not ultimately in control of what happens, but sometimes, I still find myself trying to make life 'okay' or 'perfect'.  Ha, ha!  What was I thinking?

If you are still following, you probably know that the next step in the average control freak's world is FAILURE!!  Have you ever wondered why?  Maybe God allows us to fail, so that we can grow in the realization that He, and NOT WE, is in control!  We are human, and obviously flawed, so how can anything that we determine to be right by our book, actually be right?  It is when we are listening to our own desires and wants that we fall into the devil's trap, because we are no longer listening to our heavenly Father.  While His lifestyle offers us persecution, trials and challenges, would you not rather that over an easy going life full of sin?  I know that, when I stop to take a breath, I realize that the moments I was challenged in my walk the most, are the moments I treasure the deepest.

So why do we want to control ALL- THE- TIME??  Well, for me, my control issues are representations of my lack of faith and trust in God.  You see, I am a girl who has been hurt (multiple times) and does not want to go back to that feeling of desperation again.  When your heart breaks, and you realize that this human being you put so much trust into is actually a fraud... well, your heart breaks.  I think I may have gotten tired of feeling my heart break, so I just decided to control everything.  No relationships, no depending on anyone else, no risks... just me.  When I took that leap, there was no going back.  Suddenly, everything I did... I did.  Sure, God was there beside me the whole time, but I did not acknowledge Him.  This mindset of, "I can do anything you can do better", came into play.  Although my few successes were all God, it was not until about two years later that I realized it.  Everything I tried to control, tried to force, and even tried to create, just fell through.  Something was there to catch me when I fell... but what?  All my heartaches had occurred because I was putting faith in a human or materialistic object, and not in the everlasting Father figure of Christ.

That's what I love most about our heavenly Father.  He is the greatest being, yet He is the quietest.  With Him, it is not about boasting, flaunting or teasing... everything is simple, silent and sweet.  Acts of love, true love.  Love is not boastful, it does not flaunt or taunt... and when you think about it, that is God through and through.  Silently loving and protecting us all.  Never asking for acknowledgement or thank you's, just there for you when you need Him most.

So, to all my fellow control freaks... "Let go, and let God".  Life will happen, and with life, pain and suffering... but what of the joys?  Are we to cherish them or cast them aside?  In the midst of your pain, when you just want to rely on yourself, imagine the outcome if you did... tell yourself, "Only He is big enough for this," and them give it all up to God.  He is silent, but He is loving and protecting.  When you are at your low, it is He that keeps your feet from dragging.  Depend on Him, not on you.  It's time to kiss those control freak days goodbye and become a Jesus Freak!!

Peace-Love-Christ,

Clay

Are You Really Single?

     It's been awhile since I've been able to post, but I'll take the time to XPress my feelings after speaking to a youth group this afternoon.
    So much of who we determine ourselves to be is based on status, who we are and what we do, but what of who's we are??  Have we ever stopped to think that that might be what really counts?  It is a pleasure to be able to speak with other kids etc., but the thing I'm most grateful for, is Him using me to speak.  Little of what I say are my words, but even my words are His!  It is so comforting to hear Him speak through me, so funny to hear my own words lecture myself!  Ha, ha!  To think that such a thing is possible!!  The joy I have found in belonging to Him is one I will never be able to XPress!  He is Love, He is Life, He is everything that lasts in eternity!!  No man (or woman) can compete with that!  There's no greater gift than this, "that He lay down His life for a friend".  Christ's life is the greatest XPression of love!  What a gift!  I am so in love with Him!  It's a comfort to know that I am 'taken', that I am 'in a relationship', and that I am 'in love'!  Not in the world's view of love, but I Christ's view of love!  There can be no greater gift than this satisfaction of being loved eternally and unconditionally!
     If you are a teen reading this, know that I'm in the same boat as you are.  Millions of teens all over the world are facing trials and temptations at this moment, but it is how we react to those situations that makes us different.  You can set goals, make a plan, stick to that plan, but keep Him by your side through it all and you will not fail. You will prevail, and we will walk together in His presence in the end.  Love your life, find the joy of your "Now", look to your "Tomorrow" as a gift from God, but look to your "Today" as your gift to God!  You are His beloved... don't forget it!

Peace-Love-Christ,

Clay

This Christmas Time

  As Christmas time approaches, do you catch yourself wondering where time is going?  It's another Christmas, we're a year older, and what does this past year have to say for itself?  Have you changed?  Has your priorities changed?  Did something crazy happen to you this year that changed your life forever?

     As this Christmas approaches, I see a different girl when I look into the mirror.  So many things have happened this year that has changed my life forever.  I've begun to realize how special family, and the time we have with them is.  How everything, no matter how well planned and thought out, is still in His hands.  I've realized how little control I have over my life, and how I really just need to lay it all at His feet.  This Christmas, I really don't want anything... but I want to know that life's going to be okay, I wanna know my foster brother is ours forever, I wanna know my soon-to-be siblings in Haiti are coming home, I wanna know that we're going to have a more certain coming year.  So many things that I used to wish for, like the iPhone and the newest whatever, have completely lost their sparkle to me.  I wanna know that, someday, there will be no orphans crying from loneliness and hunger, that all our tears and sin will be washed away, that life, as we know it, will no longer have fear and hate.  For the first time in all my life, that's all I want.  In so many ways, He's given me that hope of eternal life, but my human self still feels empty at times.  I read of His promise, His love and His faithfulness... but this Christmas, I want to celebrate all of that for what it is!  I don't want to be excited about good food, or presents, I want to be excited about the gift of Christ's birth, promise and plan!  Why not rejoice because of the Father's faithfulness?  Isn't that what this is all about?  He's the 'reason for the season', so why don't we recognize that?!?  Forget the gifts, forget the pies, and rejoice in all that He has given you... life, family, friends, faith, hope in tomorrow, salvation and peace in knowing it's all in His hands!  That is what I am bursting with this season, so pardon me if I don't get too jacked about presents this year.  There is so much more to life than stuff!  So why do we measure our family's love by the type of present they get us, or how much they put into hosting us?!?  Why don't we rejoice in having a family to love, and spend Christmas getting to know the people we have, in many ways, grown apart from?  Family was God's gift to Jesus, so let us rejoice in receiving such a gift as the Messiah received!  Give thanks for He is good and His mercy endures forever!  Find a way this Christmas to concentrate on the little blessings... you may find the thing you've been searching for since the beginning.  It won't be wrapped, it won't have mouth watering smells drifting from it, but it will fill you up!

Much love and a merry Christmas!

~Clay~

Target Practice

Have you ever felt that, the moment you try to do things right, you become this huge target for strife and failure?  Do you know why?  The devil is fine as long as your roots are shallow and you say you're a Christian, but don't really walk the talk.  When you start to grow, spread your roots and think for yourself, he has a problem!  You become bombarded with all sorts of setbacks, failures and discouragements, but what can you do?  Keep pushing on, keep keeping on, and NEVER give up!  Jesus said that 'for the sake of my name you will be persecuted, ridiculed and even killed... but your treasure is in Heaven."  So where does that leave us?  When we're down, discouraged and ready to throw in the towel, remember what Christ said and persevere.  For His sake, you will live forever in paradise.  As hard as that is to wrap your mind around when you are 'in the moment', it is true and encouraging.  I'm facing a few of those speed bumps right now.  I know the devil wants me to cave, and I know that that would be the easy way out, but because of prayer, supportive friends and a plan, I'm trying to fight that fight Jesus talked about.  So much of my materialistic life has been sacrificed for Him... but there's something else that I can't lay my finger on.  You see, although I've given all this up for Him, it feels like I'm still holding on to one last thing... what that is I haven't discovered, but I pray I do soon.  Imagine this... You have the keys of your life in your hand.  You're griping them tight and you don't want to let go.  All of a sudden, this hand, bigger than yours, reaches out and gestures for the keys.  You resist, not wanting to lose control, but the hand persists.  Finally, you dump some keys into its hand, yet the hand remains.  You look down into the palm of your hand and there, to your surprise, lies one last key.  Not all the keys were willingly given to the hand because you felt you still needed to control this one last key... the Father asks that you give ALL of your life's keys to him, but sometimes, we don't.  That's me.  Although I've given so many life keys to Him, there are still a few I'm griping in my hand.  Why I have no idea!  What they are is somewhat a mystery as well, but I pray that He open my heart and eyes to realize what that last key is.  If you're in the same boat, you can pray this as well.  He wants to help, but He is not a forceful Father.  He will always be there, waiting until we're ready to place that last key in His hand. :)  "Let go, let God."

Peace-<3-Let Go

-Clay-

Thankful?

     As the Thanksgiving holiday approaches, what are you thankful for this year?  Family, food, friends, indoor plumbing, toys...?   How do our lists compare to those from other countries?
     I visited an orphanage just outside of Port-au-Prince, Haiti last May, and as this holiday season approaches, I can't help but think of them.  These kids that sleep three or four to a bed, trade clothes constantly just to try to find something that fits them, who have no mom or dad there to hold and protect them, who have had to grow up WAY too fast because of their circumstances... What are they thankful for this season?  For many of the children who have been placed with a family, they're thankful that there's a hope for tomorrow!  They're thankful for the chance to one day go home to the safe and loving arms of a family that can't wait to hold them.  So many are thankful for the love and protection of Jesus Christ.  They sing their joy and praises for Him every day... "Jump, jump, jump, jump, jump for Jesus!"  Their voices carry through the thin walls of their three story orphanage and they are thankful!  Thankful to be alive when so many of their families were killed; Thankful to have friends so close to them; Thankful for their jump ropes and marbles; Thankful to have each other.  Funny how the things that we pass up as we go through our thankful lists are some of the first things that appear on theirs.  This Thanksgiving, don't forget the simple things, but rejoice and be glad for all that you have!  Try to look a little deeper, to the silent blessings... family, love, hope, forgiveness, sacrifice... and discover something you haven't given much thought to in awhile.  What would our world be like without hope and opportunity?  Without freedom and the ability to speak our minds?  Without the freedom to ask "Why?"?  Without the love and compassion we have for our fellow brothers and sisters in Christ?  Where would we be?  Or more importantly... WHO would we be without these simple things?  They are our foundation, and they are all gifts from our Heavenly Father.  So... what are you thankful for?