Control Freak?

LOL! So, I'm back!  If you are like me, you probably prefer a situation to be predictable, promising, and controlled by... wait for it... you!  Ha, ha!  If so, no worries!  Lately, the challenge of wanting to control EVERYTHING has lingered long and weighed heavily on the doorstep of my heart.  So much of me knows that I am not ultimately in control of what happens, but sometimes, I still find myself trying to make life 'okay' or 'perfect'.  Ha, ha!  What was I thinking?

If you are still following, you probably know that the next step in the average control freak's world is FAILURE!!  Have you ever wondered why?  Maybe God allows us to fail, so that we can grow in the realization that He, and NOT WE, is in control!  We are human, and obviously flawed, so how can anything that we determine to be right by our book, actually be right?  It is when we are listening to our own desires and wants that we fall into the devil's trap, because we are no longer listening to our heavenly Father.  While His lifestyle offers us persecution, trials and challenges, would you not rather that over an easy going life full of sin?  I know that, when I stop to take a breath, I realize that the moments I was challenged in my walk the most, are the moments I treasure the deepest.

So why do we want to control ALL- THE- TIME??  Well, for me, my control issues are representations of my lack of faith and trust in God.  You see, I am a girl who has been hurt (multiple times) and does not want to go back to that feeling of desperation again.  When your heart breaks, and you realize that this human being you put so much trust into is actually a fraud... well, your heart breaks.  I think I may have gotten tired of feeling my heart break, so I just decided to control everything.  No relationships, no depending on anyone else, no risks... just me.  When I took that leap, there was no going back.  Suddenly, everything I did... I did.  Sure, God was there beside me the whole time, but I did not acknowledge Him.  This mindset of, "I can do anything you can do better", came into play.  Although my few successes were all God, it was not until about two years later that I realized it.  Everything I tried to control, tried to force, and even tried to create, just fell through.  Something was there to catch me when I fell... but what?  All my heartaches had occurred because I was putting faith in a human or materialistic object, and not in the everlasting Father figure of Christ.

That's what I love most about our heavenly Father.  He is the greatest being, yet He is the quietest.  With Him, it is not about boasting, flaunting or teasing... everything is simple, silent and sweet.  Acts of love, true love.  Love is not boastful, it does not flaunt or taunt... and when you think about it, that is God through and through.  Silently loving and protecting us all.  Never asking for acknowledgement or thank you's, just there for you when you need Him most.

So, to all my fellow control freaks... "Let go, and let God".  Life will happen, and with life, pain and suffering... but what of the joys?  Are we to cherish them or cast them aside?  In the midst of your pain, when you just want to rely on yourself, imagine the outcome if you did... tell yourself, "Only He is big enough for this," and them give it all up to God.  He is silent, but He is loving and protecting.  When you are at your low, it is He that keeps your feet from dragging.  Depend on Him, not on you.  It's time to kiss those control freak days goodbye and become a Jesus Freak!!

Peace-Love-Christ,

Clay

True Friendship!

A friend of mine sent this verse to me a couple of days ago, & I would like to share it with you all as well.  At the time, I was contemplating my friendships with different peers.  When it comes to friendship or commitment, I am cautious and careful.  I don't want to let myself slip into a friendship that may not be good for me.  Both sides deserve the best, so I have this thing about rushing into any type of relationships.  The true friend, or spouse, that is meant for me someday will have that same strategy.  She/he will not be turned off or discouraged by my cautiousness, but instead, treasure the fact that I am keeping the two of us in mind when I take things slow.  Ever jump into a friendship & find out later you should of looked into the person you were hanging out with before the 'big jump'??  Me too!  However, we are all learning and there is never a too late... at least... not in God's book! ;) Peace, <3, Watchful

Sirach 6:5-17

⁵ Pleasant speech multiplies friends,
   and a gracious tongue multiplies courtesies.
⁶ Let those who are friendly with you be many,
   but let your advisers be one in a thousand.
⁷ When you gain friends, gain them through testing,
   and do not trust them hastily.
⁸ For there are friends who are such when it suits them,
   but they will not stand by you in time of trouble.
⁹ And there are friends who change into enemies,
   and tell of the quarrel to your disgrace.
¹⁰ And there are friends who sit at your table,
   but they will not stand by you in time of trouble.
¹¹ When you are prosperous, they become your second self,
   and lord it over your servants;
¹² but if you are brought low, they turn against you,
   and hide themselves from you.
¹³ Keep away from your enemies,
   and be on guard with your friends. 

¹⁴ Faithful friends are a sturdy shelter:
   whoever finds one has found a treasure.
¹⁵ Faithful friends are beyond price;
   no amount can balance their worth.
¹⁶ Faithful friends are life-saving medicine;
   and those who fear the Lord will find them.
¹⁷ Those who fear the Lord direct their friendship aright,
   for as they are, so are their neighbours also.